Life… in a nutshell
So the incredibly cold weather we’ve been having lately, and the snow that it brought with it, slammed me with migraines in the last couple of weeks. Living with weather-induced migraines in a state like Colorado (which I swear is Mother Nature’s weather testing grounds) is no easy life, and when you add an exclusively breastfed toddler to that compound, the result is a volatile mixture just waiting to erupt under pressure. Fortunately, Bro is willing to chip in and help out – if I ask. Of course, the one thing he can’t do is lactate (been trying to convince him and The Hubby that they really need to try – just for reasons like this… okay, and the incredible amount of humor that I see in it), so it means when Little Frog is hungry, cranky, hurt, or any other number of reasons for nursing, the migraine takes a back seat to him. All of this means that my blog, which was sparse to begin with, is even sparser, so to those few who are following, I apologize for the lack of content. Winter is a sketchy time for my brain, so we’ll see what happens.
On the plus side, the cold weather does have an up side. When it evens out (which means as little as snowing for a couple of days straight – no changes means no headache), and the headace goes away, I can do things inside that I keep meaning to do. So right now, I’m working on soft, unbreakable ornaments for the tree – things that Little Frog can grab and pull on (since I have no clue how to keep a toddler from being irresistably attracted to the holiday tree), working on paper ornaments for more grown-up areas of the tree – ours and our close friends, and figuring out the list of holiday baking to be done. Also, I have gift cards to mail off to my nieces for the holiday, and to figure out what to get both the Bro and my oldest niece – both of whom decided that being born right around the Winter Solstice (not kidding – they sandwich it) was the way to keep their families on their toes – for their birthdays. They turn 16 this year! 😮 I’m not sure what to think of that, but it seems like an amazing feat that they’ve both made it this far into their teens without loss of life – they’ve both pushed my sister and me (and our respective spouses) to our absolute limits. The fact that they – and we – have lived to see this birthday is sometimes a testament to sheer will power… and the desire to not have to stand trial. LOL Seriously, they’re great, amazing kids, but the teens years can be trying. So much so, that we’ve decided that Little Frog is not getting to be a teen-ager. We’ll mark birthdays til he celebrates the 12th one, and then it’s anniversaries of his 12th birthday til we get to his 20th year, then we’ll mark them properly again. 😀 Think it’ll work?
A new tradition has started…
So we had decided – mostly by my request – that this year, Thanksgiving wasn’t being celebrated. Instead, we were doing a birthday celebration – since mine fell on Turkey Day this year – and would be doing a very relaxed party. More of a “come, bring food (something you like and want to share), and hang out as long as you’d like” type of affair than a party, really. We invited our close friends, and extended the invite to family as well, letting everyone know that there was no traditional anything going on. Everyone thought this was a great idea, and the meal planning began.
We had decided ahead of time that this would be a nibble all day, no formal dining time, buffet style food service. The food would be there, and people could get what they want, as they needed it. I made a coffee cake in the morning, so that those that were close and wanted to could stop by for coffee and munchies before starting cooking. The Hubby’s college buddy was next up with egg drop soup. He mentioned that he thought it was a little to heavy on the sesame oil, but it tasted great, and the timing was perfect since I was just starting to get hungry. A little bit later, my heartsister arrived, with sushi and the makings for spring rolls and lettuce wraps. The sushi went over great, disappearing in less than 30 minutes 🙂 I know one of Bro’s favorites is enchiladas, so I made those, and rice. I had planned to make beans too, but realized we didn’t really need them; we were going to have plenty of food. People started gathering around the table to fix their plates, and the Hubby’s college buddy came back from their house across the street with sesame chicken. My other close friend brought a mexican-flavors inspired chocolate mousse – cinnamon and chili powder added a little kick, and made for a more complex flavor profile. The whole thing was finished off by a delicious chocolate cake with coffee cream cheese frosting.
The best part of the whole day – aside from the wonderful homemade food – was the lack of stress. No worries about gathering everyone up, or forgetting something. No worrying about the food coming out perfectly, or all getting to the table hot. For Bro, the best part was having plenty of foods to choose from – and foods that he either knew he enjoyed, or looked forward to trying. Towards the end of the day, I asked the Hubby if we could do this again next year – instead of Thanksgiving – because it had been so very enjoyable for everyone. He agreed that he’d liked it very much, and that yes this might have to be our new tradition. We’ll extend the invite to family again – they declined to come this time – and there are a couple more people we’ll be inviting – one had been going to come this time but wasn’t feeling well, so decided to stay home. My heartsister and I have already started thinking about what next year’s food might be – after all, there’s no reason to make the same thing, unless we really want to.
In sharp contrast was last night’s visit to family for make up Thanksgiving. The Hubby’s mom reheated leftovers, and we sat down to the table – turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, cranberry relish, yams with brown sugar and marshmallows on top, gravy, and bread. I took the things I wanted, as did the Hubby. When Bro sat down with his plate there were only three things on it – turkey, a slice of the garlic bread, and mashed potatoes. One of the other reasons for the non-traditional Turkey Day offerings at our house – Bro has always disliked (or downright hated) most of the traditional foods offered. I used to make him have a bite or two of yams and stuffing, but over the years, I’ve learned to respect the fact that he’s a person, too, and that he has a right to decide that he doesn’t like a particular food. He hates the feeling of gravy in his mouth, doesn’t like green bean casserole at all (also in this category are Hubby and me), has never ever liked yams – ever, and most of the time doesn’t like cranberry stuffs – too tart for him. Grampa gave him a hard time about the lack of stuff on his plate, telling him he’d have to grow up some time and actually eat foods that are at a dinner. To my gratitude, the Hubby jumped in immediately and defended Bro’s food choices. This all served to reinforce the idea that perhaps we as a society have become to hide-bound regarding what foods should be eaten on which day or at which time. Makes me really glad we did something different this year.
So for next year, I’m thinking of fun things that I’d like to try, and thinking about foods I enjoy that I want to share. I know there are a few people who’ll definitely be joining us, a few who are maybes, and possibly a few that won’t join us. If there are those who don’t want to join us, I’m just as happy that they don’t… if they don’t want to eat with us, then they shouldn’t come. 🙂
41?!? So soon?
So a tradition we started in our family a few years ago is the Fortnight Celebration. For those who might not know, a fortnight is 14 days, or two weeks. What we have realized is that sometimes, the important events in our lives (anniversaries, birthdays, major holidays) don’t fall on days that make it easy to actually celebrate on that specific day. For instance, my birthday is right around Thanksgiving – actually on Thanksgiving this year – so because of that, getting together on the date itself doesn’t happen very often. It’s usually more of a “Happy Thanksgiving!, and since we’re all here today, we’re going to acknowledge L’s birthday” celebration. Also, if the occasion falls in the middle of the work week, that can add stress to what is supposed to be a happy thing. So, we instituted the Fortnight Celebration. Any time during the week leading up to the day of the event, and any time during the week after the event is okay for celebrating. If we’re not doing anything specific on the proper date, we always make sure to acknowledge it by a card or something. It’s fantastic, because it actually feels like an event when you celebrate off and on for two weeks! 🙂
😮 Which means we’re in my birthday Fortnight, already! Friday night, The Hubby brought home some pretty purple carnations, as a way of starting off the celebration, and it made me realize I’ve got some work to do around the house this week. You see, as part of my birthday this year, I asked for something I rarely ever get. I asked for my birthday to be more important than Thanksgiving – I don’t want to celebrate Thanksgiving-with-a-side-of-Laura’s-birthday. I want this day to be about me, for once. It took some doing, mostly because he has family in this state, and there was the worry of will there be upset and hurt feelings if we don’t do Turkey Day on Thursday. Since we made plans for this about the middle of last month, there weren’t any concrete plans for Thanksgiving yet. Everyone seems to be okay with this, except for the fact that (as we found out last week) due to schedules and things, there’s not a good time to get together any other day. So the rest of the family will be celebrating Thanksgiving, while we and our so-close-they-might-as-well-be family friends will be celebrating my birthday.
No turkey at this get together, we’re going to celebrate with a mix of foods. I’m doing enchiladas, rice, and beans. My heart sister and her man will be doing Vietnamese spring rolls, and sushi. The Hubby’s college buddy and his wife will be bringing egg drop soup and sesame chicken. One of my other good friends is bringing cinnamon chocolate mousse. Rounding this up is my doula friend, and possibly her husband if he doesn’t have to work that day, bringing something as yet undetermined. Somewhere in all of this, The Hubby and Bro have mentioned doing a cake – 😉 we’ll see if it happens this year. So we’re looking at possibly 11 people in my smallish front/dining room and kitchen. Since my heart sister and the college buddy both live close – within easy walking distance – their food will be prepped at their houses and brought over. Hopefully the cake will be done beforehand, since I’ll need the oven for the enchiladas, but that’s about the only possible kitchen conflict. The biggest issue will be moving stuff around so that there’s room for everyone to not feel crowded. The basement is useable as well, and it may be a secondary place for splitting into a smaller group. We’re planning on nibbling throughout the day, so no real serious need for seating, but the table can accomodate all of us, if we’re willing to snuggle in.
I’m looking forward to this. Thanksgiving is usually very stressful, trying to make sure that everyone has what they’re going to need for the whole day (the day very often starts with breakfast or brunch and goes from there), and getting out the door, in the car, and to our destination in time to eat breakfast while it’s warm. To top it off, Bro has never liked the traditional Thanksgiving foods – ever – and so he’s usually pretty hungry by the end of the day, because the foods he does like – dark meat turkey and potatoes – are the things that go the fastest. He’s never liked stuffing, or yams, or cranberry sauce or relish, or gravy, or green bean casserole (and I don’t either). I’ve had him try them, every year, but I figure he’s almost 16 now… if he hasn’t acquired a taste for these foods, he probably isn’t going to anytime soon. So this year, no turkey dinner, no stress, no trying to figure out what foods to take for Bro (he follows the Feingold Program, so we have food issues to worry about) to snack on.
The only part that’s blowing my mind… how’d my 41st birthday get here so damned fast? I don’t feel 41, probably because I’ve not been 41 yet, so don’t know how it feels; but in my mind, I’d always thought of it as feeling older. I don’t think I look 41, but I’m probably not an impartial judge. I’m not as energetic as I used to be, but I’m blaming that on Little Frog… he’s very active 😉 and it takes a lot to keep up with him. I can’t be 41 yet… my oldest is still a teen and I have a 15 month old (he will be 15 mos exactly on my birthday 🙂 ). I have a marriage that’s only 2 years old. *sigh* Yeah, I know, I’m 41. It’s not a bad thing at all, just surprising.